Chapter 4, The Responsibility of Men
Li Siwen's movements paused as she recalled the purpose of summoning this wretched creature, and she immediately suppressed a third of her anger
Li Qinzai stopped in his tracks
Li Siwen stared at him in shock, his hand frozen in the motion of stroking his green beard
This son, whenever and wherever he sees him, Li Siwen's emotions are always rich and layered, ranging from disappointment to disgust, from anger to indifference
At this thought, Li Siwen's gaze towards Li Qinzai became increasingly unfriendly, and even the way Li Qinzai walked seemed particularly jarring to her
Unable to pay the rent, the landlord threw out my belongings. I sat alone in the dark corridor, gnawing on a cold bun while carelessly calling my girlfriend to tell her crude jokes
Your Majesty, three cups of wine for the esteemed grandfather, and then what?
Strange, yet heart-wrenching
Withdrawing the hand that reaches out to one's parents after reaching adulthood is the most fundamental responsibility of a man
Li Siwen could not continue, yet Li Qinzai's expression remained calm throughout
Li Qinzai's expression changed dramatically, and he retreated several steps, saying: "Father, please calm your anger. If you strike me, I will run away, and we will be unable to discuss important matters."
In his previous life, Li Qinzai graduated from university and worked for over ten years in society, bending over backwards for his superiors and putting on a smile for his clients. Even when wine was splashed on his face, he still smiled like a dutiful son.
Yes, the child knows his mistake
Li Siwen suppressed the thoughts in her mind, and upon considering the troublesome consequences, she suddenly felt a complete loss of strength and energy
If you had this kind of responsibility a day earlier, I would risk my life to ensure your safety
On that night when the flowers bloomed and the cicadas sang, if only I had decisively withdrawn at that moment before the shivering, and shot a bag of seeds against the wall, how wonderful and joyful Li Siwen's life would be now
Is it because the trouble caused this time is too great, so great that it cannot be salvaged or reversed, that one has grown overnight
And then? Li Qinzai asked
With a heavy snort of anger, Li Siwen sat down again and coldly said: "Regarding the matter of the Flying Horse Jade Carving, the Emperor has not mentioned a word. He only reminisced about the grandeur of the late Emperor Taizong during the banquet with your grandfather, speaking solely of your grandfather's achievements, and the banquet came to an end.
"Beast, do you still have the audacity to bring this up!" Li Siwen shouted angrily, then looked around, clearly searching for a suitable weapon.
On countless quiet nights, Li Siwen gazed up at the moon with a heavy heart, lamenting that bringing such a being into the world was the greatest mistake of his life. Over the past twenty years since Li Qinzai's birth, the quality of Li Siwen's life had significantly declined, while his blood pressure had notably increased
In this era where transportation is inconvenient and wild animals roam freely, being exiled for a thousand miles is considered a severe punishment. Many prisoners do not even reach their destination, as they are often devoured by beasts along the way or fall off cliffs and die.
The images in my mind flash rapidly, from Li Qinzai's early childhood babbling, to his willful and unruly behavior as a child, and then to his arrogant and overbearing demeanor in his teenage years
Li Qinzai was certainly resistant to the impending outcome
The Censorate has submitted twenty-three memorials to impeach the Li family, all concerning the matter of borrowing the flying horse jade carvings to impeach your grandfather, claiming that his power is excessive and that his descendants are arrogant. The court is already in an uproar, and both Your Majesty and the Empress are unable to suppress it. Unfilial son, you have done a good deed!
"Qin Zai, do not blame this old man for being ruthless. I am powerless against you, but the Li family has many members, and we cannot be implicated because of you..."
There are no positive emotions; seeing him fills one with a sense of negative energy.
Her eyes gradually reddened, and Li Siwen sighed softly: "... ... It's too late, far too late"
With a complex expression in her eyes, Li Siwen said to Li Qinzai: "You should be somewhat prepared; this time you cannot escape. It is likely that your exile over a thousand miles has become a foregone conclusion. The emperor's banquet is probably intended to convey this intention to your grandfather. In the near future, the Dali Temple may very well summon you for questioning."
At this moment, the sense of responsibility and maturity displayed by Li Qinzai is something he has never encountered in his life
Li Qinzai furrowed his brows: "Not a word mentioned?"
Li Siwen cast a cold glance at him, and then remained silent.
In his heart, this father before him was merely a stranger
Li Siwen cast a cold glance at him and said: "There is no 'then'; after the banquet with the Son of Heaven, your grandfather withdrew from the palace."
Since childhood, your grandfather and I have spoiled you excessively, allowing you to be willful and unruly. As a result, you have gathered more and more unscrupulous friends, becoming increasingly arrogant in public. Ultimately, you have caused a tremendous disaster that is now beyond remedy. The calamity of today is not only your retribution but also the retribution of the Li family
Li Siwen murmured, "Not a word has been mentioned, this is certainly not a good thing, I fear even the emperor cannot withstand the discussions of the court officials..."
Li Siwen turned her head away, unable to meet Li Qinzai's gaze, and sighed sadly: "You... prepare yourself, in a few days there may be an imperial decree. After leaving home, take care of yourself, three to five years, three to five years later..."
After dawdling, he arrived at the front hall, where his father, Li Siwen, was already seated inside, waiting for him
Looking at the unfamiliar father before him, Li Qinzai suddenly smiled, his smile more radiant than ever before
Father, I understand. The trouble I have caused, I will bear it myself, without implicating the Li family
Otherwise? Should one cling to Li Siwen's thigh and plead pitifully?
"I pay my respects to you, Father." Li Qinzai said softly
Only at this moment today, Li Qinzai appears particularly unfamiliar to others
Strictly speaking, migrating a thousand miles can be considered a "half-death sentence"; once a person leaves Chang'an, their fate—whether they live or die—depends entirely on the strength of their birth date and time.
What is the difference between this and enjoying cold beer and skewers at a barbecue stall a thousand years later while casually boasting about the past
No matter how difficult or bitter it became, no matter how many times he was trampled into the mud, degraded to a state worse than that of a dog, he never complained or pleaded with his parents
However, Li Qinzai remained completely unperturbed internally
Li Qinzai hung his head, and the front hall fell into a brief silence, the air seemingly stagnant, with an unprecedentedly cold atmosphere between father and son
In a previous life, I had read some books, and Li Qinzai had a general understanding of what migrating to Lingnan represented
Disasters are caused by oneself, and naturally, the responsibility lies with oneself
The son before me suddenly became incomprehensibly unfamiliar, the boy who once caused trouble only knowing how to shirk responsibility, play tricks, plead for mercy, and even roll on the ground in a tantrum, now stood like a pine tree in the snow, unwavering, using his upright posture to convey that he is capable of shouldering responsibilities
Li Qinzai was completely unaware of the rich emotional fluctuations of his father at that moment. He simply walked calmly down the steps, removed his shoes upon entering the hall, and awkwardly bowed to Li Siwen.
After a long while, Li Siwen finally broke the silence
Li Siwen's eyes were filled with disappointment; instead of hitting or scolding Li Qinzai, he let out a long sigh.
Authorized by the Emperor
The various experiences cannot be described as particularly great, nor can they be deemed humiliating; they are merely the hardships that an adult man should endure
Li Siwen's anger surged up in her heart
Li Qinzai cautiously inquired, "Has the Son of Heaven mentioned the matter of the Pegasus jade carving..."
The former Li Qinzai would not have been so honest; regardless of any mistakes made, he would always speak with confidence and justification, consistently finding excuses to absolve himself of his errors
A grave mistake has been made, the outcome is already determined, and it is difficult to reverse.
Li Siwen stared at his back and suddenly called out to him
After Li Qinzai finished speaking, he bowed to him and turned to leave the front hall
Li Qinzai did not understand why Li Siwen suddenly brought these matters up; he was merely a frivolous young man without any official position, completely unconcerned with court affairs
Li Qinzai was stunned for a while, the matter was discussed in a disorganized manner, the ruler and his ministers had a drink together, chatted about trivial matters, and then it was over
Traveling thousands of miles is not about sightseeing, not about self-driving tours, and certainly not about romantic poetry and distant horizons
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Li Siwen was taken aback, feeling quite surprised by Li Qinzai's honest admission of fault.
Even if one is blessed by auspicious stars and arrives at a place of exile, one remains merely a commoner, compelled to participate in local labor. Not only will one be bullied by the locals, but even the most basic necessities such as food and medical care cannot be guaranteed. A mere headache or cold could be considered as having one foot in the gates of hell.
It is only natural for a stranger to abandon oneself; what emotions could there be?
Li Qinzai sighed silently, I really am just the scapegoat
The brilliance in Li Siwen's eyes resembled the burnt-out lamp oil, gradually dimming
After calming himself, Li Siwen continued: "This morning, His Majesty summoned your grandfather to the palace and hosted a banquet. His Majesty conversed joyfully with your grandfather, reminiscing about the remarkable contributions your grandfather made in assisting the late Emperor Taizong, which greatly benefited the Tang dynasty. The Emperor was deeply moved, shedding tears continuously, and even honored your grandfather with three cups of wine..."
The middle-aged man before him is his father, who openly expressed his intention to give up on himself.
However, as a junior, Li Qinzai understood that he must still play the role of a supporting character
If a person can only have one character inscribed on their tombstone after death, then the character on Li Qinzai's tombstone would certainly be "tired"
What then
The bond of blood cannot be denied. One would expect to feel great pain and anger from being abandoned by family, yet Li Qinzai displayed no such emotions, as if he were merely listening to a stranger recounting an event completely unrelated to him
Upon seeing Li Qinzai walk in, Li Siwen's eyes widened, and an inexplicable surge of anger suddenly welled up in his heart